Crooked Pictures

Postmodernism offers asylum for all of us who are incapable of hanging pictures straight. After all, who gets to determine what is straight? Perhaps the walls are not straight, so who can be faulted for hanging a picture crooked under an uneven ceiling?

"But this presupposes some standard against which the straightness of ceilings can be measured, a concept anathema to postmodernism," you protest.

Well then, perhaps the picture only looks crooked because you have not tilted your head in the proper direction. Who is to say the picture is not straight and your head crooked?

"Ah, but there is that word 'proper'," you say, "which ill befits postmodern thinking."

Very well, then, you should tilt your head such that the angle of the picture pleases you.

"Did you just use the word 'should' as though I am subject to some objective, moral injunction regarding the disposition of my perspective toward pictures? And are you further suggesting there exists outside my own consciousness categories of 'angularity' and 'linearity' toward which my perspective should conform?"

Really, this has become quite bothersome. I only meant to suggest that people with no facility for hanging pictures find a philosophy friendly toward their limitations in postmodernism.

"You mean to suggest there is some discrete, discernable boundary of human capacities against which 'limitations' can be ..."

Hmph!